I finally got my NYIP Unit 4 critique back from Jerry Rice! For those of you who think critiques aren't long enough, don't worry about it. I think I managed to get Jerry Rice to talk more than anyone else! Get ready to see my Unit 4 pictures one last time, it'll make it easier to see his comments in context. Also forgive the bold type; my writing is in bold, Jerry Rice's comments are in normal italic.
First off, I got an A on the exam; I only missed one question.
OK, here we go... Jerry started the tape with a quick overview of the 3 NYIP Guidelines, then started with the critiques.
Photograph #1: Head & Shoulders Indoor Window-Light Portrait w/Reflector.
Good window light portrait, exposure correct, picture's sharp, the frame well-filled with the subject, thus simplifying the picture, the third NYI guideline. There's nothing I would crop here. As I said, the frame is nicely filled. Sometimes I have to say to a student, there's too much space up above, too much to the left or to the right; you're filling the frame very nicely, and you should always do that. Now, the expression is excellent. Getting good expressions are always questions of good timing on your part. The moment before, the expression wasn't there, later, they will have disappeared. To get them at the right time is good timing. That's focusing attention on your subject. That's your 2nd NYI guideline. Focus attention on the subject. Exposure perfect. I like the way you've turned the shoulders at an angle to the camera. If the shoulders are parallel to the camera back, you've got a driver's license identification type photo. If you angle the shoulders slightly, and this is not a great deal that you've angled here, but you angled them slightly, that will avoid the driver's license ID photo and will even enable you to have your subject to look directly at the camera and it still will not look like an ID photo. As long as the shoulders are not parallel to the camera.
I entered some notes on the photo project form. For this shot I said, "This is my first unit shot 100% digitally. Converted to B&W in Photoshop CS and raised black level in Camera RAW plugin. Metered w/Sekonic L-358, ambient reading."
You have some notes here... this is your first unit shot 100% digital. Well, you did well with it. It was converted to black & white in Photoshop and raise... etc. I, uh, you don't have to give me any of this digital information. Not the least bit relevant. All I am interested in is the final print that you've handed me. How you got there, that's up to you. So you can save yourself some time. You can record it for your own information, but you don't need it for my information, because as I say, I'm not interested in it. I'm interested only in the final result. The great photographer Edward Weston once said, "I don't care if you make your print on a bathmat, as long as it's a good picture." Well, all of Weston's pictures were good, and he did none of them on bathmats.
Photograph #2: Head & Shoulders Indoor Umbrella-Light Portrait w/Reflector.
Alright, Gregory Jr., your 3-year-old son, a handsome boy. And you have used your studio lighting, your Alien Bee from Paul Buff down there in Nashville, TN, and your exposure is perfect, you're filling the frame once again, very well with your subject. Be careful about the hands. You're cropping the hands off the picture, I would do one of two things. I would either crop much higher, Greg, just before the shoulders, or I would crop much lower and include the hands, because after the eyes and the mouth, the hands are the next most expressive part of the body, and when you can work them well into the composition, you strengthen the composition. But you're giving the appearance here of, uh, the boy being an amputee. I don't believe that's the case. I certainly hope it isn't. So crop a little higher, or crop a little lower, but not near the elbows, or near the wrists. Show the hands, the hands are very expressive. I want you to take a picture where you've used the hands. In picture 3, in picture 4, in picture 5, in picture 6, you use the hands for those very effectively. So you can see how well that technique works here. Now, your exposure is fine, and your picture has captured a wonderful expression on the child's face. Getting that good expression is a question of good timing on your part. A moment before, the expression wasn't there, a moment later, it will have disappeared. To get it at the right time is good timing, that's focusing attention on your subject, and that is your second NYI guideline at work. Focus attention on the subject. Now, you've also placed Gregory well off-center, using the rule of thirds that you learned in Unit 2, because these lessons are cumulative, and each is a building block for a future lesson. The dark background against the light tone of the skin and hair is good. Dark against light, or light against dark, uh, helps to give a good 3-dimensional feeling. You ought to be on the lookout for those in other pictures as well, and the structure of this rustic chair he's seated on is good too, because it serves as a framing device. You had framing back in Unit 2 also. It's a good photograph, and we're ready to move along.
More notes: "Sharpened slightly in Photoshop CS. Shot handheld w/PC Sync cord. Metered w/Sekonic L-358, ambient reading."
I want to look at your notes here, oh, these are notes dealing with Photoshop. Let's go on.
Photograph #3: 3/4 or Full-Length Indoor Location Portrait.
We're looking now at the self-portrait, of yourself wiring uh, electrical equipment, computer. I have a favorite photograph I must tell you about here, because your picture reminds me of it. I have a book on lighting, written by Ross Lowell, the inventor of the Lowell light system, perhaps you've seen these, these are studio lights, and Lowell perfected them. And he has an illustration called A Gaffer's Nightmare, a gaffer being an electrical repairman and so forth, doing a hookup job in a wet basement with old wiring and says something like, prepare to meet your maker, standing in about 3 inches of water, doing a wire hookup. (laughs) Your picture reminded me of it, I must warn you, be careful. This is the environmental portrait, and you've done it perfectly. You're showing yourself making the hookups to the connections, I don't know anything about wiring, so I can't expound on that, but the exposure is perfect, you've placed yourself off-center, utilizing the rule of thirds. The picture is acceptably sharp, you're filling the frame very well, simplifying the picture.
Notes: "f/11 to maximize DOF, fluorescent bulbs turned off, shop light bounced off ceiling. Tripod, shot with remote release & timer."
Stopped down to f11, you've got good depth of field. You need depth of field for a shot like this. Fluorescent bulbs turned off. That's good, because they would have given you bad color. (Note: it's obvious to me that Jerry Rice doesn't know a lot about digital) Uh, the shop light was bounced off the ceiling, tripod shot with remote release and self-timer. Fun, a good environmental portrait, nicely done.
Photograph #4: 3/4 or Full-Length Outdoor Location Portrait w/Framing.
We're turning now to a picture of this lovely young lady, "Meegan", or "May-gan" as some people pronounce it. I don't know how you pronounce it, I've seen it both ways. I think actually the correct pronunciation makes a name a celtic name from either Wales or Scotland or Ireland, or Britain, England rather, I believe "May-gan" is the correct pronunciation, but many Americans say "Meegan". She's a lovely young lady, and you have framed her very well with the flowers and the foliage. You've also made good use of selective focus, throwing the background out of focus, a technique you learned about way back in Unit 1. I'm glad to see you making use of that there. So you have used two of your former lessons and selective focus, and used them very well. Now you're also photographing at a time when the sun is down, late evening sun. That's virtually the same as open shade, or an overcast day. Perfect light for portraiture. You've heard me say in the past, bright sunlight emphasize texture, whereas overcast days and open shade emphasize very subtle color, and that's what you have here. A beautiful use of the hands, as I mentioned before, through the eyes and the mouth, the hands are the most expressive part of the body. In addition to that, uh, you have a very good expression on Megan's face, and that's good timing on your part.
Notes: This was a shot I really struggled with, my first real session using the 10D. It was also before I discovered custom white balance. I wrote to NYI, "Color-corrected @ 7500K w/Photoshop CS due to inaccurate auto white balance. First real shoot w/Canon 10D, before I learned to custom white. Used rose garden as framing device."
You said color corrected to 7500K, that seems odd to me. Now, let's see, noontime the sun directly overhead is about 5500K, yeah, that could be 7500K, I don't think that makes much of a difference, because the exposure is correct. The color balance--you said that it was inaccurate auto white balance. Okay. No problem. Um, nicely done.
Photograph #5: Baby, Child, or Pet Expressing Personality.
This is Jenny, your 3-month-old daughter. Very good use of the reflection here. Anytime you can get a repetition of forms, something like reflection, you'll strengthen the picture. Reflections are not the only way to show repetitions, but they're commonly used for that purpose. They were used well here, you've filled the overall frame very well with your subject, and the exposure is perfect, the focus is acceptably sharp. One minor criticism, uh, Jenny's left foot is protruding from her head. For a better picture, you need to either hide that foot completely behind her head, or show more of the leg. Uh, it's awkward to do with an infant crawling on a table, to get the exact composition, but for a more perfect composition, you'd be better off without the foot there, or better off showing more of the foot, one or the other. And that use of reflection was excellent.
Notes: "Handheld. 1/8-inch plexiglas on black fabric. Shadow level raised 25% in Photoshop CS, surface scratches on plexiglas & plexiglas edge removed w/clone tool."
Now let's see, you used plexiglas on black fabric, that's good planning. And we're ready to go on now.
Photograph #6: Group of People, Must Have Relationship, Not In a Line.
We're looking at the group picture of the Chance family. Wife, daughter, son, etc. And you fill the frame very well with the subject, simplifying the picture. I'd like to try to see how we could fill the gap between Mrs. Chance and Gregory Jr., there's too much of a space there. Here's my recommendation: have, um... somebody has to hold the child, the baby. Um, maybe put Mrs. Chance behind Gregory Jr., and you take your hand and place it to hold up the baby. That should fill in the gap between Gregory Jr. and Mrs. Chance. Too much of a hole there. And, um, I'd step back a little bit so that you get Mrs. Chance's hands in the picture. The exposure is good, the picture acceptably sharp, the frame well-filled with the subject, and you said the second niece was standing behind the camera, acting silly (laughs) to hold the kids' attention, and apparently she did.
Notes: "This is our official 2005 family Easter portrait. Tripod w/shutter release. Had my niece push release once per second, 2nd niece stood behind camera acting silly to hold kids' attention. I directed nieces from in front of camera after setting up the shot. Whitened my teeth in Photoshop."
You directed the nieces from in front of the camera after setting up the shot, and you whitened your teeth (laughs) in Photoshop. Well, okay, fine, um, that uh, you're the first student that I've ever had in 20 years in correcting photos, work on the teeth. Most of the time, it's some other part of the body (laughs), but I find it a little bit amusing that you whitened the teeth. No reason why you shouldn't! Absolutely no reason why you shouldn't. If Photoshop can correct other things in the picture, why not, uh, dentistry! Well, why not. I think the background of the fountain works well, and you have everyone looking at the camera, which is good, and that's the way it should be. Hand gestures are all good. Nicely composed picture, I would just try to make that suggestion of moving Mrs. Chance a little bit behind Gregory Jr., and then you put your hand on the baby. I'm not sure that would work, but I would try it.
OK, good job, and I look forward to your next work with great expectations.
Thanks for reading this very long message, everyone! This has been my best NYIP Unit so far (of 4 total turned in). Let's hope the next one turns out as good!
